October 9, 2009
You know,there’s always a dark hole hidden deep beneath each & everyone of us. At times we’re caught in a state of confusion, even when you’re so sure that you’re doing it right but just never quite good enough. The haunting is undeniably painful and living in the shadows of the darkest point in your life under the same roof makes it even more difficult. Growing pains leaving scars which can never be erased.
This is by far the most frustrating and heart breaking feeling that I’ll have to go through knowing that I’m the verge of just giving up. Perhaps maybe I’m not the ideal,but I’ve never really given up. It was you who gave up on me,it was you. Knowing that there’s no chance in hell I can ever live up to your expectations, its so suffocating but at the same time I am literally living off hopes for tomorrow.
Then you shut me out claiming that I keep having something to look forward to for my tomorrows.
I plant seeds of hopes,hoping that one of the many seeds would bloom into something beautiful someday.
Just wish that sometimes you could secretly hear my thoughts that I am nothing without you.
You’ve saved Alvin from his darkest hole,but you’ll never ever give your own daughter a chance to break free from the past which she deserves. In the case if anyone should ever wonder how do you recover from the past; have wishful hopes & don’t ever quit. Beneath every sweetest smile,there’s always a broken heart to mend. Much love,cheerios.