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In The Heat of The Moment.

March 12, 2013

Greetings. I’ve had quite a good weekend, and staying away from all the negative energy helps. I’m not sure how to put this down correctly but I think things are about to change pretty drastically on my end. My happy joyful days of games and fun are coming to an end, and its back to full on work mode. I like routines. I like it random too. I think that planning ahead is crucial, and sticking to the plan is another challenge. Things were a little messy, but it is all a matter of adapting. Which I have, slowly, but surely. I’m trying to be more positive, be more open to differences, and to stay firm to what I believe in. I’m not rejecting change, but I’m not gonna sit around pretending to be a better version of myself. Let the change happen naturally.

 

I think I’ve spent too much effort trying to fix things. I hung on to my dreams of making it happen, and for that, it ripped me apart as time passed us by. People don’t understand how did my heart get so cold. They don’t understand that the heart too, can slow its pace and die. I’m not trying to pull the victim card, but I know I’ve given my all. It still hurts, but I think this time, I need to give myself a second chance. Hit the reset button, and start all over. I have so much in love in me, but its all bottled up inside. Its almost as if I’m unwilling to be vulnerable and the fear of being abandoned is just too much to bear.

On a more positive note, I feel so incredibly dumb at the moment. I’m currently taking three core subjects this semester, and I feel stupid all the time LOL. :) I’m not sure if there’s a better way to phrase this, but maybe this is a sign that life is opening up another door to further upgrade myself? Its not a great feeling being so insecure about what you’re studying in uni, but this is where hard work will pay off. I think that it is normal to feel demotivated, but it is important to give yourself a knock on the head that learning, will always be beneficial. I’m also trying to get back onto my previous workout routine. Eating clean helps, but I think I should sleep earlier and wake up to gym in the morning instead of trying to squeeze it in during midday.

Many have asked me about my workout routine, well here goes. Trick is to make sure that your work out is intense, with minimal rest time and always ensure that you tighten your core. :)

3 sets 10 reps of everything

  • 20kg barbell chest press
  • 20kg barbell rows (sometimes I switch it up and do lat pull downs instead)
  • 35-40kg deadlifts
  • TRX suspended crunches
  • TRX oblique twist (finally can work on obliques. remember to only work on it after you lose most of the fat around your belly/love handles

6 sets 10 reps of everything:

  • Squats up to 60kg. (super happy about it because I’m squatting heavier than my own body weight yay!)
  • TRX suspended crunches

 

First, why it’s important to detox your life of negative people (source):

  • Negative people slow you down towards achieving your goals. They discourage you from being ambitious or following your dreams by questioning what you’re doing and planting doubts into your head.
  • Negative energy from toxic people effect your energy level, not to mention your stress and anxiety.
  • You need to create space for positive change to happen. Being in toxic relationships with people and allowing their negative energy into your life will hold you back from manifesting opportunities for success. Also, releasing negative people creates space for positive people to enter, who will encourage, support, and help you grow as a person.

How to detox negative people from your life:

Step 1: Decide that you’re worth it

  • You need to feel as if you’re worthy of achieving your goals and changing into the person you want to be. Letting go of any negativity in your life will help you get there faster.
  • How to realize you’re worth it, you ask. Simply make the choice and decide that it’s time you committed to yourself, your goals, and your dreams and you won’t let anything or anyone slow you down.
  • Think about the negative side effects of holding onto these relationships. Ask yourself:
    • What effect are these relationships having on my life?
    • What are my goals and how badly do I want to achieve them? Are these people supporting my goals or slowing me down?

 

 

Step 2: Identify the toxic people

  • Toxic people make you feel worse than when you started talking to them. They bring your energy level down. They leave you feeling bummed out. Notice how your body feels after talking to them, particularly your chest and stomach which are areas where most of us carry stress and anxiety.
  • There is a difference between someone sharing with you their struggles/challenges versus someone who constantly complains.
  • Toxic people shoot down your ideas. They always question what you’re doing. They may say something like, “Well, maybe you shouldn’t change careers because you have so much job security here. What about your benefits? Or your retirement?” This is pretty common and sometimes subtle and harder to notice. Even though it may sound like they’re giving you advice, in the end they’re just putting more doubts into your head because your actions may bring up their own fears and insecurity.
  • Toxic people can fall within the spectrum of being subtly draining to all around toxic and poisonous. Even if they fall on the less severe end of the spectrum, it’s important to identify this and work towards letting them go as they will still affect you negatively.

 

Step 3: Let them go

  • Just start. Use whatever method you think is appropriate. Avoid them. Don’t pick up their calls. Apologize for being distant but know that you do not need to explain why or defend your actions.
  • Avoid explanation because they are probably in a state of mind where they are not open to listening. They may take it personally that you are letting them go, and will probably get on the defensive if you try to justify your reasons.
  • Do it gracefully and with love. Send them off with love and a prayer. Be open to the possibility that if and when they are ready to change and be more positive/supportive, then you would be open to rekindling the relationship.

 

Step 4: Don’t feel guilty

  • Again, you are worth it. You must be your own BEST FRIEND. If you don’t take charge of your life and well-being, nobody will do it for you!
  • You are not abandoning them even though you may feel like that. There is a distinction between abandoning someone and letting them go so they can find their own way. If you’ve already tried giving them advice, encouragement, or even a wake-up call and nothing happened, then no amount of wise words from you will change their thinking or behavior.
  • It’s not your obligation to keep these people in your life regardless of the relationship. Whatever the reason, people grow and change and it’s normal for relationships to evolve, or dissolve.

 

Step 5: Bring in the positivity!

Surround yourself with positive people. These are people who:

  • Support your ambitions
  • Encourage your ideas no matter how scary, risky, or seemingly unknown the outcome could be because they know how important it is for you.
  • Are up to big things. They are people you admire because you think they kick ass in life!

Alrighty guys, I have a long day ahead of me. Hope you enjoyed the read. :)

Happy Birthday Megan ! :)

Related posts:

  1. Chin Chin; Perfection.
  2. Remember This Moment.
  3. Every Lesson Forms A New Scar.


1 comment “In The Heat of The Moment.”

  1. Farah says:

    I’m actually bookmarking this post seeing how beneficial it is!! Thanks for the inspiring post <3

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