Greetings.I did try to live up to my new years resolution to update every single day without fail; it was highly possible, but I’d definitely lose the ‘wow’ factor if I was just writing it for the sake of it right? The first week of January has been nothing short of being hectic, submitting my applications, finalizing my move to the University of Melbourne next month; and oh my god the amount of stress; insane! Its always this point of time where things feel as if its moving at the speed of light, and I wish so badly that I can slow time down a little bit.

Here’s to explain myself about my absence over the last couple of days. Well, when I was over in Guangzhou during Christmas; met this Tibetan priest(thats what he calls himself) and he claimed that I had a tumor/growth at the back of my head at an area somewhere above my neck. It could have been a total lie; he’s probably trying to suck cash out of my parents, and it turns out (after running tests & x-ray of the skull) I’m happy to announce that it was just another beautiful rumor of a tumor wtf.

A pretty rare family picture up on the blog.

New Year’s eve was spent with my Advertlets family comprising of my favorite people; although there were a couple of them who weren’t around to complete the night. I’m really grateful, frankly with the friends I’ve made through my blog or rather through being a blogger; and I know there’ll always be all sorts of people that you come across, but I’m thankful to have made such wonderful friends,who’re pretty much family now. There’s always this sense of connection and I know how people would often underestimate the power of the world wide web in what it offers; a platform that connects bringing people together.

Dinner at Skewers,Subang Avenue !

The night would’ve been perfect without them.

Yin Xie and Ewin.

Christine from Melbourne; you should be seeing more pictures of her when I’m in Melbourne!

Josh Lim.

Azrin, Nigel & Rebecca.

Xiang

Jon & Jeremy.

They both have one thing in common; their love for cheerio.

Camwhoring in the ladies.

Then to a private hotel suite to meet the rest !

David Lai makes me giggle.

Justin Hee.

Jason Mynjayz.

We’ve always asked ourselves if we’ve made the right decision leaving behind what was once very important. I had dinner last night(more like an after-dinner dessert) with Chammaine & David; speaking about reading the palm which I obviously won’t disclose any of here, but two things I’d like to point out which was true, I’m an emotions sponge; not emotional. Just like a sponge I’ve been absorbing all the hurt, pain, joy, and love over the past 5-6 years; absorbing, getting squeezed every once in a while but always absorbing.

It seems like its already hot wired in me to absorb just like everyone else; but like any other sponge, the last couple of months of last year was the breaking point. It was a point where the sponge had gotten so heavy where it no longer held its original nature to absorb and all it did was leak,leak and leaking it all away. It all makes sense to me now on why I chose to let my five year long relationship go gradually over the last couple of months; I was no longer capable of absorbing anything anymore.

As a sponge,

When my aunt & grandmother passed away in September, that took a big hit on me; so much that it lead to a chain reaction not only on myself but my extended family members as well. It was that major turning point where I once imagined it to be another fall from grace; you know the whole pulling a Britney wtf where you just lose your conscience and all your actions just don’t make sense. Sadly to say, I’ve always been aware; that it was nothing but a reaction.

It was frustrating for everybody else especially on my parents, close friends and Alvin when they see the burning light in me going dim; and me withdrawing myself from everything I’m familiar with. Like a sponge, I was worn out & absorbed more that I can contain.Truth is, this was yet another turning point in my life; after the whirlwind session in high school. You know that sort of feeling where you’ve had enough of everything you’ve had, and you won’t stop till you upgrade your life taking it to its next level.

Frankly now, I’ve grown immune towards negativity when it comes to a third party’s opinion or what not when it comes to my actions. You’ve got to realize that as much as they know(or claim to know), you’ll be at the receiving end. Thats when I realized, that there are just some roads thats meant to be taken alone; I didn’t get my heart broken this time around; I chose to break mine. The reason I could never really move forward in my life because I feel too much for the people around me; that sometimes it sucks the life out of you, so much that sometimes all you lack space for yourself.

Its never in my nature to be mean or selfish, as the matter in fact; taking that biggest gamble to stay put in Malaysia for a year was the biggest risk I’ve taken because sometimes I believe that love is worth your time. I know very well that when I love, or if love finds its way to my doorstep; I’ll breathe life into that someone special’s life again. Love is not just a feeling; it gives you strength, it lightens up your darkest nights, it makes your every tomorrow seem like the greatest thing to look forward to, but most importantly it sets your heart on fire.

You no longer wake up in the morning feeling like you’ve got no purpose in life.
I’ll never give up in love & I’m pretty sure love will find me.
I know I’m worth it.

Related posts:

1. Halfway Out The Door.
2. Half A Decade.
3. RIP Grandma <3

Posted on Sunday, January 9th, 2011 in Blogosphere, Cheerio thinks a lot, Love & Romance, Past, Personal Writing Masterpieces. Subscribe to this comment feed. Leave a response, or trackback from your own site.