There has always been this darker side of things at home that I cannot tolerate. Even one bit of it makes me very upset and perhaps this is something i will never get over with. They say that there’s always two sides of a story when you talk about an individual, and the only probable person that can drive me up the wall would be that one lady who never fails to screw up my life.

Perhaps maybe nobody will ever see it my way about how much she has put me through and how much I still have to put up to up till today. Sometimes I wish I was equally deaf, blind and bimbotically blonde hoping that I could see past her actions. Hate is an understatement when it comes to how I feel about her.
You can screw up my childhood for all I care, I can forgive you but I can never forget it. Old habits die hard, and for her case it’ll probably never die. Such a manipulative individual who literally bullies me imposing her I am your fucking grandmother now listen to me you little twig head; that only happens when my dad was at work.

Such a daddy’s little girl.

I may have gone wrong with my actions, being rebellious at some point and frankly speaking there is this point in each of our lives where we really figure ourselves out. Its an unavoidable turning point and that’s it. So what me such an angry child; that lady who’s acting like a bloody ten year old living under my roof right now.

Cancer has changed her ways last year, she was no longer up right mean and nasty but the stubbornness is inevitable. She has this sneaky side of her where she’ll pour her dinner away in a newspaper when we are all done eating, or she’d either eat way earlier. Then after wrapping the food, she’s throw it out of the kitchen window which my mum ending up as victim cleaning after her mess.

Its her actions that i cannot put up to. You know, we all kinda disobey because we were young and naughty knowing that our parents are always wanting the best for us,right? For her case, it was nothing for good. Its not the usual long-winded and cranky old grandmother, it’s a plain nasty old lady that only puts me through hell ever since I was six years old.

Let me fucking remind you, six fucking years old.

So I bet the assumption would be, she does the same to all my other siblings and cousins. Nope, unfortunately I am the extra privileged kiddo. The amount of hate that I hold towards her can just make me burst into tears because she was fucking mean and now acting all out like a baby and expect people to forgive her?

My mum has lost at least 15 pounds since that lady had cancer. Every single fucking day, mum has to cook some special porridge to maintain her diet, and you know what is the bomb? She throws away all her medication which costs hundreds of dollars; quietly. Fine,these pile of shits I can put up to, close one eye and just live with it.

What I really cannot put up to would be how my mum has to yell at that lady to eat her meals, medications and the outcome of it; high blood pressure. I have two other aunts that doesn’t give two shits about her, I wonder why! She has no respect for my friends, me, my belongings and shall I dare proclaim no respect for herself. The best part of all this, she tortures my dog Brownie whenever I am not around. Like using her walking stick and hitting Brownie with it, spitting at my dog wtf she is seriously pushing me to my limits.

I am always held at gunpoint when my dad wants to kick her out and my mum gets upset over it. So why don’t I just dig a hole and live in it, right? No you’re so wrong if you think that I deserve this, because I owe nothing to her. I swear that things would have been handled way differently if she wasn’t related to my mother. Nobody should ever insult my friends, spit at my dog or ever impose her rights on me that way.

FYI, there was never a love bond in any figure of speech, any form of action whatsoever; so you can rule out a probable breakdown or misunderstanding between us. It was just a plain bitchy move; with an
extraordinaire supreme rights over me.

I need a hug! Okay I can’t go on,bye.

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1. A Pardonable Insanity.
2. In My Castle.
3. Oh, Ken & Barbie.

Posted on Tuesday, January 20th, 2009 in Cheerio thinks a lot, Past. Subscribe to this comment feed. Leave a response, or trackback from your own site.